large amounts of my reviews are getting deleted because I gave a sprite movie a zero!!!

oh boy newgrounds sure is great huh?

LOCAL EMPORIUM DATAFLUX

Updated whenever I feel like it, which means almost never.

There is a section on my EXCELLENT FORUM OF FUN for discussing it. SIGN UP NOW YOU BLOODY PEASANT

YES

THIS COMIC ABOUT THE GENERAL THEORY OF RELATIVITY INCONCEIVABLE MIRACLE

READING OF ENTERTAINMENT TO PREVENT BLOOD-FILLED DEATH OF MANY PAIN EXCELLENT

motherfuckers

hey worldspace, stop stealing my fucking movies.

also, you should watch this. it's pure fucking genius.

go back to 2001

Fuck you all.

This place has gone down the shitter to the point where it isn't even worth trolling anymore. The admins wave their dicks around deleting things and portal banning people for no reason at all, the mods ban everyone they see, there's some sort of portal watch bullshit now, and it seems to me that the rules are set up to discourage any form of individual thought and turn the users into mindless sheep.

People are bugging me to comment on their userpage/join their shitty flash group/massvote their shit through/help them get an award/some other bullshit. Why the fuck am I some sort of internet celebrity? If you want shit massvoted through, get Tor, steal some old accounts, and mass it through yourself. If you want to start a flash group, don't. Fuck userpages, fuck flash groups, fuck Newgrounds, and fuck you.

The admins are sellouts and the mods are power-hungry lunatics. The rules of this shithole were designed to disallow any form of individual thought and encourage the hivemind bullshit that puts money in Tom's pocket. Wade deletes everything he thinks could possibly be offensive because he doesn't want Al Sharpton to protest and cause Newgrounds to lose advertisers, conveniently ignoring the fact that any site, even fucking 4chan, can get advertisers. He even said so himself. If Newgrounds gave as much of a flying fuck about racism as it pretends to, I wouldn't be able to make a post with the words "honkey", "spic", "kike", or anything else in it, but I can because there aren't any raving militant supremacy groups for those races.

I once got a 15-day BBS ban for telling people to stop sucking Wade's cock in one of those threads. What the fuck was that bullshit?

I got locked out of my account once for submitting movies on alts. What happened to "Everything by Everyone"? The only reason I got locked out was because they passed. Many people have done portal floods with many more flashes, but they got blammed, so nothing happened to them, whereas mine passed. There wasn't any mass voting involved; they actually passed. I also got locked out of my account once because I submitted a flash that had a swastika in it and some Portal Watch fucktard bitched to Wade about it. Grow a pair, you faggots. I submitted something with almost exactly the same flash in it a few months before that and nothing happened to it. That just shows how quickly this place is going downhill.

I wonder how long it will be before there are "portal mods" who can delete every movie they don't like and ban the users who submitted them.

All of the flashes on the front page are complete shit. Video game parodies were never funny, but they get frontpaged because they bring in idiots who pollute the site and make video game parodies rise to the top of the portal. THEY AREN'T FUCKING FUNNY AND THEY NEVER WILL BE. FUCK YOU ALL. Anyone who likes watching the same recycled shit repeatedly shouldn't be on the fucking internet.

Hell, just look at the collections linked to from the front page.

Flash Portal History 2007: The movies of last year that the idiotic userbase liked the most.
Tankmen: Recycled dick jokes.
Video Game Parodies: This speaks for itself.
Awesome: More video game parodies. Egoraptor's bullshit is basically the same movie with different jokes. He never tries to get better at Flash or do something that doesn't fit into his "Awesome _______" formula because he found something that sells T-shirts.
Pico Day 2008, Pico Day 2007, Pico Day 2006, Pico: Recycled characters in recycled movies. Fuck that.

Fuck the redesign. Actually, fuck Web 2.0 in general. The internet should be hard to use, otherwise it gets flooded with idiotic 12-year-old Mario fanboys and Myspace fucktards to the point where there are no sites worth mentioning that aren't completely filled with them. Hell, I remember when computers didn't even come with TCP/IP drivers and DOS was the dominant operating system. Those were the fucking days. I doubt that even 1% of the people on the internet could use DOS if their fucking life depended on it, even though DOS is so easy to use that a trained chimp could use it.

Why the fuck is there a Video Games forum? Obviously, Newgrounds didn't do enough to attract idiots, so the admins had to sell out even more.

Eat shit and die, all of you. If I come back, it will probably be for hacking practice.

I'll still be on AIM and my shitty dead forum whenever I have access to a computer, so if you want to bitch at me or something, do it there.

(Besides, I'm going away for six weeks starting in a few days and I won't have access to a computer.)

320x200 35fps flash 8, it doesn't have to be good or anything and you really don't need any flash skill, but if you want to make something really good that's okay also

and they aren't really spam

in case anyone gives a shit

or just wants to be coauthored on something in exchange for like two minutes of work

The s key on my keyboard broke, so now I have to ctrl+v (I copied the letter s) to type s.

Fuck, this is going to get annoying.

My internet connection died pathetically at around 10:30 last night.

Of course, I lost both awards that I was trying to get because of that.

Fuck.

You kids might want this.